look at me! woooooooooo!!!

so i knit now. don't know if i mentioned that but i do.
i guess I'm just some kind of jack-off of all trades. i like it though. it relaxes me.
i need as much of that (relaxing) as i can fucking get cause i feel like i am always at the helm of some form of insanity.
i like being functional and productive. i helps me.

work is the same, a little better but nothing to really mention. i mean i guess i just did mention it...but.

randomly i have managed to be some brand of informal confidante to people who choose to share their personal business with me. not that i mind being a gigantic ear. it's always nice to know you have someone to listen to you and know that you have been heard.

someone who you think may understand even if they have no clue where you are coming from. i get this a lot from customers at work. they just spill the fuckin beans like I'm Dr.Laura (or Dr. Ruth at times) . wow a divorce, wow your wife cheated, wow your kid died. holy shit please open up a new department for me and call it: "Jamie listens to you bitch"
maybe i could get paid more for that? doubtful, but worth a shot.

a lot of friends and random acquaintances have been sharing with me a lot lately too. as if i am out of the loop enough for their words to never have to reach other peoples ears. not like i would ever give up any confidential information. what people tell me is on a one to one basis. i never slip it out to anyone.
i think it is just good to have someone who is outside of the realms of your own personal world who can look at your situation and give you prospective.

i had a friend like that when i was younger. i could tell him anything with out judgement or unwanted advice. he would listen to everything. i miss him sometimes. he knew me better than almost anyone. except maybe Aaron. he knows me better than i know me.

i am sick and i need to clean. i feel like i just took a mental dump and need to take a nap.


heres a personal picture share.

me circa 2004(ish)